Chapman’s best selling book, he talks about the ‘five love languages’;

1) Acts of service
2) Words of affirmation
3) Quality time
4) Gifts
5) Physical Touch

The premise of the book for married couples is that some people very much love each other, but fail to communicate their love to one another because of a ‘language’ barrier. When you know the other person’s love language, you can love that person the way they want to be loved, not the way you think they should be loved (and vice-versa). Based on the way a person is raised different
things will make them feel loved. An example is when a man showers his wife with gifts, but she feels unloved because her primary gift is quality time or she feels more loved when he does things around the house.

Some people treat God the same way. They think they are doing God a favor by going to church (even though they may be a bench warmer), or maybe fasting (without consecration) or some just have a ‘gimme’ nature. (gimme my house, car, breakthrough, increase my territory etc). If some marriages don’t last because of people being ‘self-willed’ you may expect that our relationship with
God lacks ‘oneness’ and falls short of the potential it could have.

Of course God gives us love
1) Acts of service:
Dying for us while we were yet in sin (Rom 5:8)
2) Words of affirmation:
“I’ve appointed you (I trust you)” (John 15:16),”Well done, good and faithful servant”
3) Quality time:
“I will never leave you, nor forsake you
4) Gifts:
“By grace we are saved, not by works, it is the gift of God” (Eph 2:8) “covet earnestly the best gifts” 1 Cor 12:31 “If you ask anything in my name, I will do it” (John 14:14)
5) Physical touch
“Abide in me and I in you..”John 15:4 “And we have confidence in the Lord touching you” 2 Thess 2:4

So how can we give back?
1) Acts of service:
Matt 28:19 “Go ye therefore, and teach all nations… observing all things whatsoever I have commanded you…
John 14:12 “He that believes on me, the works that I do shall he do also; and greater…”
God’s desire (will) is that you spread His love with word and power. Don’t gossip or put down any of His creation.

2)  Words of affirmation:
1 Thess 5:18 “In everything give thanks, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.”
Ps 22:3 ‘God inhabits the praises of His people’
When you’re in love with God, all will be able to see it. You can tell God you love Him in a valentine card. Don’t complain.

3) Quality time
Matt 6:6 ‘pray in your closet and I will reward you openly’
Eph 5:16 ‘redeem the time, for the days are evil’
2 Cor 10:5 ‘bring every thought to the obedience to Christ Jesus’
God wants your moments. Refresh yourself with his presence. Don’t serve two masters.

4) Gifts:
Rom 12:1 “..present your body as a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service”
The Lord would not ask you to do anything He wouldn’t do! Don’t defile your temple.

5) Physical Touch:
John 15:4 “Abide and me and I in you”
Heb 4:15 ‘For we have no an high priest that cannot be touched with our infirmities…”
Bring Him your weaknesses, Go boldly to His throne. Let His righteousness overtake you, Let the weak say I’m strong! Don’t wait. He has a marriage banquet prepared for us all, and He prepares us for when we will go home to be with Him forever.